Red After Sin

To sit here and rhyme,
they all sound the same.
The writing is back,
but the feeling is lame.
I hope you are happy now
you gave me a wish -
you drove me to pain
to see how I list,
to note how it takes
a thousand more tears
to gain what was lost
these past-recent years.
A thousand and one
were required to die
to give me this skill
to lack beauty inside
and out, all around
to show the disturbed,
the twisted, demented,
the last one unnerved.
And all for a thought?
A meaningless word?
A poem perhaps,
or a saying, unheard?
A loss costing more
than the worth of the win,
A pain pushed below
to the red after sin.