Vertigo

Everything feels so blurry, and vague.  

Like a film covering my eyes and sending me spinning into a whirl of dizzying reality, I stumble and fall.  

I try to orient myself, to look and see and understand.  

It's all abstract, surreal, convention and fake.  What is real? What should be real? What should anything be? 

I stand unsure of it all, facing decisions only half understood, but determining harsh realities.  Painful choices.  

I don't know what I think, or feel, or want.  I wish I could know what's real.  I wish it were black and white.  I hate the possibility of hurting someone, but in all my choices I hurt someone... And I also hurt myself.  

What is right in a world covered in haze, twisting in whirlwinds? Nothing is right in this darkness.  The light I once saw is long gone.  There is no choice for happiness.  Only pain.